Precious

"God hath not promised skies always blue, flower-strewn pathways all our lives through; God hath not promised sun without rain, joy without sorrow, peace without pain. But God hath promised strength for the day, rest for the labor, light for the way, grace for the trials, help from above. Unfailing sympathy, undying love..."

Today's blog is in loving remembrance of my niece, Precious Hope. Precious was born and entered into rest on Nov. 30, 2002. I catch myself thinking about her from time to time. Would she have the curly hair her sisters have? Eyes as blue as the sky like little Shainy's? Would she be the big shot goalie like her big sis Sam? Sadly, we will never know. She is greatly missed by a multitude of family members.

Time has surely gotten away from me! I wanted to keep this blog updated as best I could, but there really hasn't been much to update. Todd is feeling so good right now, so good that he has virtually forgotten all he's been through in the last few months! Wrestling season is fastly approaching which means he will be extremely busy with work and officiating. I know he's feeling well when he's ready to get out there on that mat.

My mom, my mother-in-law , and I recently shared a girls night out friday night. We went to Cleveland to see An Evening with Scott Hamilton and Friends. For those of you who don't remember Scott Hamilton he is an Olympic figure skating champion who was diagnosed with testicular cancer back in 1997. He underwent a regime of successful chemotherapy treatments, surgery and recuperation. Instead of picking up where he left off in the world of figure skating, he felt he needed to do something more for others suffering from cancer. Scott founded the Scott Hamilton CARES Initiative ( Cancer Alliance for Research, Education and Survivorship) and is also a spokesperson for the Cleveland Clinic Taussig Cancer Institute. The CARES Initiative was started by Scott in order to raise cancer awareness while at the same time raising the money to fund such research to help for a cure for all types of cancer. Scott's mission is "to erradicate cancer in my lifetime." So back to friday evening, the ice show we went to see is only put on once a year to raise funds for the CARES Initiative and to give back to the people of Cleveland. The most amazing part of the evening was not the skaters, it was a young 16 year-old boy. This boy is in his second year of fundraising for cancer reasearch. During the brief intermission, he presented the Taussig Cancer Institute with a check for $108,000! His goal next year is to raise $250,000! I could not believe it, a young boy who should be worried about football games or girlfriends or what to do to on a friday night was spending his time raising money for cancer! How amazing!

My new job is going well. In fact, I love it! Last week I spent a couple of days in Cleveland for the 11th annual Innovations in Neurscience Nursing Conference. It was 3 days packed full of information. I think my favorite lecture was the one on mitochondrial disorders. In that particular lecture we learned about a study that was done in Portugal that could link a form of autism to a mitochondrial disorder which in turn could lead to a treatment! The study only showed a small percentage and it's virtually impossible to replicate that study here in the states, but it has paved a path.

Brynn is keeping busy with school- she loves it! She is slowly becoming a little adult! Just ask her dad, the other day he was trying to talk to her and she gave him the old "whatever" with the hand wave. That was priceless! I keep hearing that she acts more and more "like her mother!" I beg to differ. I would love to say it's the female gene, but she is one heck of a tomboy, too. On a recent trip to the circus, her favorite part was the dirtbikes. She couldn't wait to see the dirtbikes! When they finally came out she could hardly sit in her seat! None the less she does have her girlie moments, like screaming at the top of her lungs when anything Jonas Brothers comes across the radio or tv! And lets not even get started on High School Musical, Hannah Montana and iCarly.

As for Kael-he's content with putting his puzzles together and riding in the combine with "pa." He has his little perch, which happens to be my dads armrest, that he has to sit on when he's riding with "pa." He doesn't want the buddy seat it's attached to, he wants the armrest right next to "pa." I think my dad was ready to have a little boy around to share his passion for tractors with. After 4 girls (3 living)-and one more possibly on the way (I'm going to be auntie again!)- who could blame him! Kael is my little cuddlebug. He catches me offguard sometimes when he comes up, gives me a hug and says "Mommy your my best friend." By the way- those were his exact words after receiving his Flumist at the docotor's office one day. I think without a doubt he is going to be quite the ladies man! As Todd would say- "Just like his daddy."

Doctor day...

Whew, where has the time gone! First off, let me say that it has been crazy busy at the Mowrer house these last few weeks!! All holds true when they say there are not enough hours in the day. I'll begin with Todd updates. Last wednesday was the visit with the "ear doctor". Dr. Weber is satisfied with Todd's recovery process. I'm not so sure whether it's fortunate or not for Todd to regain the hearing in his ear because now I know he can hear all the "honey do's". Fortunate for me, unfortunate for him I suppose. As for his visit with Dr. Kraus today, all went well! The CT scan came back showing improvement and his serum levels were within normal limits! His next set of labwork and scans will be in December and every three months for a year.

As for the rest of the clan, Brynn will be starting her second year of preschool next week! I still can't believe how much my baby is growing. She never ceases to amaze me with some of her antics! Anyone that knows her, knows just how much energy she has. I wish I could say that it just oozes out of her, however if that were true I would surely pick up some of her reserves. Since she needed an outlet for all that energy and she loves any and all kind of sports, we signed her up for soccer. We had clinics all last week and she showed them what she had to offer, which by the way will not be goalkeeper! During one of the scrimmages, coach put her in goal. Apparently there was not enough action on her end of the field because she began pretending the goal posts were monkey bars. If that weren't enough, she decided it was break time so she ran off the field, grabbed her water bottle and took a seat! We couldn't contain the giggles! She simply stated "Daddy, I needed a water break." That's our B!

Kael is beginning to enter the dreaded "terrible two's". He is a little man with a very large temper. Potty training is his event this fall. There are days when he will just scream "I want my mommy" or "I want my daddy" between sniffles while he sits on the potty. My absolute favorite moment was one evening when I was getting them ready for bed. I sat Kael on the potty beside his big sis, well he couldn't go. So I stood him up to the potty and I told him to try and hit the little hole down in the bowl. He stood there for a time just looking and then ever so innocently he said, "Mommy, it broke. It won't work." I really don't think I made it through the bedtime story without giggling!

As for me, I recently started my new job at the Clinic. After getting moved around in the different departments, unbeknownst to me I'm told, I have finally ended up in Neurology. I'm really looking forward to the challenge! As I opened a new door, I had to close one. I finally shut the door on my family and friends at Buehler's after nearly 11 years of service. So for those of you in my Buehler family that may be reading this- it was really hard to walk out that door for the last time last week.

Just a dream

Well, our much needed vacation was cut short due to Hurricane Faye! Our bright sunny days on the beach were soon overshadowed (no pun intended) by the fury building to the south of us. We debated wednesday night about packing up thursday morning and heading home, but thursday morning came and the sun was shining through the palm trees. Being that no hurricane was going to dampen our spirits, we decided to head to the beach. Once we made our way down the path and crossed through the little sand dune, our hopes were bombarded with 25mph winds and black clouds off the horizon. We tried to take one last walk down the beach, but the winds were so strong and the blowing sand felt just pelted us. Dismayed we took the final walk back to the beach house and finished packing up our things. Faye was not going to chase us back to Ohio though! We found a hotel in Charlotte thursday night and took the kids to the Discovery Place in downtown Charlotte. That place is amazing! It had such neat exhibits for the kids. They especially loved Einstein's Corner when Carolyn blew up a balloon filled with hydrogen! Not even Todd nor I expected such a loud bang! Friday afternoon saw us making the long trek home. Let me just say that while I'm glad Grandma Ivy let us borrow the movie "Cars" I will be more than happy to return it! Kael is a huge fan and we had to watch it nearly the whole way back to Ohio! Hours later I just had to put Jungle Book in, one can only take so much of Lighting McQueen! I must admit that I'm sure glad it was not Barney blaring through the speakers!

It was so nice to be away from home, to forget about all tests and doctor visits. It's that easy come, easy go lifestyle I love. I'd have to say that this vacation will definately not be forgotten. We won't forget about those sharks, dolphins or jellyfish that paid us a friendly, but scrary, visit. The sand dollars were amazing, not to mention the starfish. We have taken several trips to the beach, but I don't think my eyes have been open, nor my mind, to the colors, sounds or smells quite like this trip. This trip was much more appreciative because my husband was by my side to share it with me. Until this past May I never once thought of anything happening to him. I never thought there would come a day when I had to think about losing my best friend, my soul mate. Unfortunately, that day came. If there is anything I've learned from this is that I take to many things for granite.

We walked through the doors of the CTC for one last time today. I have to hand it to the staff in there. They are amazing! For the type of people they take care of and what they do, you can feel the warmth there. They truly care. In fact, as we walked in the receptionist was saying "Hi, Todd" with a huge smile on her face. Once down the hall I heard another ask, "So how was the vacation?" and she really wanted to hear about it. Really I can not say enough about the staff in there, I'm so glad that they took such good care of Todd. They really made him feel like part of the family and not just another patient coming in for treatment.

As for the actual visit- Dr. Seider is done with him until his check up next August!! He said he felt everything went well and all looks good. Our next step is Dr. Kraus, the Urologist, at Aultman. He will read the results from the CT and bHCG tests Todd had two weeks ago. If all goes well there it will be a series of CT scans and bHCG tests every three months for the next year or two.

Vacation ready

Pardon the delay in updates, although nothing has really changed since I last posted. Todd still has his bouts with nausea, but fortunately it's beginning to seem less and less. I'm beginning to think that maybe our vacation isn't meant to be! This last week our friend Berger, part 1 of the couple we are vacationing with in less than 2 weeks, ended up having an appendectomy this past weekend! Apparently it was largely inflamed and the surgeon really had to work to remove it. He now has to have an MRI because of a spot they found on the CT scan which he had while in the ER with his appendicitis. So while Todd 2 (Berger) is going to have an MRI early next week, Todd 1 will be having a follow-up CT scan on Tuesday! Seriously- will this not be a much needed vacation or what! Add to the multitude of health issues, I have been interviewing for a nursing spot at the Cleveland Clinic here in Wooster. Stress city here at the Mowrer house!

Our doctor visits will start next week. On August 5th Todd will have his follow-up CT scan for Dr. Kraus (Urologist) then on August 6th he will be seeing his Otolaryngologist Dr. Weber (more commonly known as the "ear doctor"). Following vacation he will have another PET scan for Dr. Seiders (Radiation Oncologist) along with a visit, and a few days later is scheduled to see Dr. Kraus.

This past Saturday there was an amazing article on the front page of the sports section in the Daily Record about a 20-year old junior A hockey player for the Wooster Oilers. Corey McDevitt made it known to the press that he is currently battling testicular cancer. Diagnosed in March of this year, Corey has already been treated once. Three weeks ago his blood tests came back to show the cancer had returned, this time appearing in the lungs. Right now he is currently undergoing chemotherapy at the Cleveland Clinic Wooster. Every three weeks he finds himself having seven-hour treatments five days a week. Yes, I said seven! What's even more amazing is that he wears his ice skates to every treatment. He has been proclaiming to be ready to hit the ice come Halloween! Talk about determination! That is what it takes to come out on top. He aslo mentioned that his inspiration comes from none other than Lance Armstrong. I have already sent an email to lend support to this young man, if anyone else would like to do so he can recieve letters at: Alice Noble Ice Arena, 851 Oldman Road, Wooster, Ohio 44691 or emails can be sent to coachhart@nc.rr.com. Also if anyone is interested, the title of Lance Armstrong's book is "It's not about the bike."

As for Todd's aunt Sandy, she had her surgery and is doing well. I believe she is going to be starting her chemo in the next week or two. From my understanding she will be seeing Dr. Stallings, a Medical Oncologist, here in Wooster.

Although everyone has done so much for us already, I would like to ask that you still keep our family in your thoughts as we are still not in the clear yet and unsure if we will ever be.

Bittersweet

As one Mowrer is finishing up cancer treatments another will just begin. Todd's aunt Sandy was just recently diagnosed with lung cancer. From what I understand it is a mixture of small and non-small cell. She will travel to Columbus to have her right upper lobe removed and then undergo chemotherapy here in Wooster.

Todd was worried about being fatigued when we go on vacation, but the nurse assured him that within a week he should start feeling less tired.

For those of you who believe in superstitions, on the day of Todd's last treatment we seemingly adopted a little black kitten, appropriately named Midnight by pawpaw Larry. It came out of the cow pasture and perched itself, with help from Java, up on the fence post where it stayed for hours until Todd came to the rescue. Kael, my little animal lover, just can't get enough of it and Brynn likes it until it starts to get playful with her then she starts running through the yard crying "It's chasing me! Get it away!". So I guess our family has grown by one more!

Heading for home

Todd is rounding third and heading for home plate! I can't believe how these last few weeks have just flown by! Thursday will mark his final treatment. According to Dr. Seider, his PET scan was clear and his bloodwork, which he had drawn last week, came back within normal limits. As much as we'd like to bid farewell to all the scans, blood draws and doctor appointments, it won't be happening anytime soon. Dr. Seider and Dr. Kraus would like to see him again in four weeks, each doctor wanting their own seperate scan and labs. Dr. Seider would like a PET scan and Dr. Kraus would like a CT scan. I can already hear the misery in Todd's voice when he mentions the PET scan! If all of the scans and labs come back clear, then he will see Dr. Seider once a year for five years and Dr. Kraus will probably be once every three months throughout the year.

The radiation is finally starting to catch up with Todd. This last weekend he found himself dipping into the Compazine quite a few times. He gets hungry, takes a few bites and then ends up feeling sick or gets a faint aroma of something and gets sick. At his appointment today he told the nurse how he had been feeling lately and her reply was that now he knew what being pregnant was like. I must have been in the back of his mind somewhere because his response to her was "No I wouldn't say that to my wife because she'd say "no you don't know how it feels to be pregnant!""

Looking back I still can't believe how this all happened. Life can change in just the blink of an eye. As much as I felt like blaming someone in the beginning, I came to the realization that this is our plan. This plan was in the making long before that first date many years ago and I'm ok with that. I'm a firm believer of things happening for a reason and I have learned to just roll with the punches and things will get better. One day coming out of the CTC Todd mentioned how it hurt him to see some of the other patients in there looking so fragile while at the same time he's walking out full of energy. So on days when I feel like crumbling, I stand tall realizing that someone out there has it far worse than me.

Time away

It was nice to getaway, or rather somewhat away, this past weekend. My grandpa has some property, 13 wooded acres of bliss, near Seville/Wadsworth area. That's our annual getaway to celebrate the 4th. It's just nice to go back, relax and spend time with family. The kids can run wild and have a ball! Whether it's skipping stones or catching waterbugs, they all have a blast in the creek which runs right through the property. Once night falls, they turn their attention to the army of lightingbugs flying innocently in the air. All the stresses just seem to melt away, especially when you watch the little faces light up with joy when they made a stone skip 3 times in a row! I like to see my own doing all the things that I loved to do back there when I was their age. Kael loves the blackberry bushes, not to mention the wild strawberries! The two of us took a hike Saturday morning to gather berries and everytime we took a step he seemed to find even the smallest strawberry hiding under a leaf. He'd pick, eat it and say "MMM, that good mommy." I'm thinking to myself, "Bubby, I hope that was a ripe one or your gonna have a tummy ache". He was very helpful when it came to picking the blackberries, too. I did have to remind him to pick the purple ones and not the red ones a time or two though. I was telling Todd the other night that back when I was B's age there was a lot more property than what there is now and I knew every inch of it. I used to love when Grandpa would have to go back to "the Woods", as it was known back then, to mend fences. Our break times would be little weenie roasts and lemonade. Those were goood times. I'm so glad that we were able to keep some of the land so that my kids can experience the joy that land brought me.

As for Todd, he's doing well. He missed two days worth of his medicine and I think it might have caught up with him. Friday night he had the misfortune of getting a little sick. He's still not sure whether it was something he ate or if it was because he missed taking his pills before his treatment the last 2 times. All was well the following morning though.

The countdowns have now begun- 2 more weeks of treatment and 5 weeks and 4days until our much needed vacation at Hilton Head!!! Happy 4th everyone!!!

15 sessions and counting

Today was the beginning of Todd's treatments. His appointments will be Monday-Friday for the next 3 weeks. I had to laugh because when he got home today he said "it's a good thing I'm not shy because I had to get naked from the chest down in front of 3 women!" I'm thinking to myself "Honey, you've never been pregnant before!". You tend to lose all modesty after giving birth to babies... am I wrong ladies? So I kind of had to let out a little chuckle on that note.

Moving onto his actual treatment. They laid him down on a "table-like" bed where he got tattoed again on his abdomen and sides. The tatt's are actual cross-hairs and the other markings on his abdomen look almost like a roadmap. Before they started he said they had to reposition him several times to line the cross-hair's up with the radiation machine. While under the machine you have to lay totally still when it shoots the radiation on top of you (stomach) and then underneath you (back). Todd said that the actual treatment took less than 5 minutes and said it's just like getting an x-ray. The positioning is what takes the most time because you have to be perfectly positioned the same way everytime so the radiation hits the exact same spots everytime.

We were forewarned that he may have some bouts of nausea, so Dr. Seider did give him a prescription for Compazine which is a pretty nasty antiemetic. He has to take that every day before his treatment and then as needed. I asked him how he felt when he was done today and he seemed to feel pretty good. He wasn't feeling nauseated or tired.

Brynn and Kael are still fascinated by daddy's new body markings. I'm just waiting for her to get a hold of the markers and start marking herself (or Kael) all over! I can just hear it now, "Mommy, I look like daddy!" Thank goodness for washable markers and bathtubs! She already likes to give Grandpa Larry tattoes when he falls asleep on the couch! I guess we have an aspiring tattoo artist among us.

The second time around...

Todd had his PET scan this morning. This time was much better than the last. He didn't get sick this time with the GoLYTELY! For fear that he might get sick again, the poor thing didn't eat much yesterday. Not eating much helped him alot. Needless to say, he was starving after the scan! The nurse from Dr. Seider's office said that he could expect to start his treatments as early as Wednesday or Thursday of this week. I told him that we'd have to have a graduation/radiation party at the end of the summer!

Dr. Weber, Hillcrest Atrium

Not only does Todd have testicular cancer, he just recently had ear surgery as well. Nearly a year ago he was getting terrible ear infections in his right ear that wouldn't go away, not even with antibiotics. It was also discovered that his hearing in that ear left much to be desired. Long story short, we ended up at the Hillcrest branch of the Cleveland Clinic with Dr. Weber. It was found that Todd had a cholesteatoma on his eardrum. The cholesteatoma is basically a cystlike sac of dead skin cells that secrete an enzyme which in turn causes damage to the hearing bones within the ear. Todd has had a significant amount of hearing loss in that ear (for those of you who know him, it's now confirmed that he has a reason to talk loudly:) ). On April 28, he had some pretty invasive ear sugery. The incision goes from the top of the ear all the way down and behind. It looks as though they just flopped his ear over and went in from behind. The whole procedure was outpatient and lasted 3 hours. One might think that the two might be related, the cholesteatoma and the testicular tumor, however they are not.

Today he had a follow-up visit with Dr. Weber. Everything seems to be healing well and they believe they cut out all of the infection. He will go back in August to have his hearing reexamined and then he will have some rehabilitation in that ear. I'm not exactly sure how they are going to do that because I didn't go to this appointment with him so I'm only going on what he told me. It does sound kind of crazy though!

So I guess you could say we have had a rather hectic last couple of months! As Todd would say, "I turned 30 and things started falling apart!"

Laughter's the best medicine

After the initial shock set in of Todd's diagnosis, we have tried using humor to help us cope. Jokes, one-liner's and nicknames help to keep us upbeat, but yet I feel as though it seems as though we are not taking this as serious as we should. Lying in bed last night it hit me. Todd & I both joked about his having to drink the bowel prep. I even mentioned something about it in the previous blog, but when it actually came true last night, I felt really terrible. I love my husband more than anything and, yes, I felt oodles of sympathy for him last night when he got sick. I think what I'm getting at is that despite the ups and downs of this roller coaster ride, we can still laugh. It might be painful, but we still have the ability to laugh and enjoy life.

Fast forward to the morning- Todd drank the GoLYTELY like he was supposed to. Even when his gut told him enough was enough he followed the instructions to drink the whole gallon. He arrived at the hospital to be prepped for the PET scan. He had his IV dose of radioactive material (to light him up like a Christmas tree) when he learned that there was some difficulties with the machine. Long story short, next Sunday he has to repeat the GoLYTELY! However, next Sunday, he will be eating supper a little earlier and will likely only drink 1/2 the gallon. For those of you who have ever had a bowel prep it's likely you can understand.

Just another day

Todd had stopped by the Center yesterday afternoon to get "tattooed" and to have his mold made. The "tattoo's" are the basically landmarks so that each time he goes in the tech's know exactly where to aim. The mold is just from his waist to his knee's and he has to use that each time he goes in to correctly postition him. He still is not very happy about having to drink the GoLYTLEY. (Ha, Ha) I'm sure that come Sunday night as he's racing to the bathroom I will be reminded of the speech from my nursing school graduation, aptly titled LPNS: Lots of Pain, No Sympathy! Sorry Todd! I still have much love for you!

Four weeks after his treatments, which should end in July, he will have to go back to Dr. Seider to check everything out and then once a year for five years. I think that come August we will both be more than ready for vacation!

As for the kids, Kael is to young to fully understand what is going on, but Brynn does have some questions. This morning she was just asking about Todd's tattoo's , she thinks they are bandaids. Since he doesn't look ill on the outside, it's much easier to explain to her. Honestly, to look at him, you really wouldn't have a clue he has cancer. He really is taking it all very well and i think part of it has to do with Lance Armstrong. The week that he was off from his surgery he found Lance Armstrong's website and did alot of reading, after that he has taken this all in stride. We are so fortunate that he doesn't have the fight that so many others have.

Cancer Treatment Center

Yesterday we met with Dr. Seider of the Cancer Treatment Center to discuss the radiation therapy. He was very short and sweet and cut right to the point. Treatment will last only 3 weeks and will be 5 days a week. From looking at the pathology reports he wasn't so concerned about the questionable lymph node, however, he did order a PET scan to clear the air. ( A PET scan is a type of nuclear imaging similar to a CT scan.) Todd has an appointment Monday morning at Wooster Hospital for the scan. Unlike the CT scan, he will have to drink a bowel prep which leaves him with little enthusiasm! Once he get's the images from the PET scan, Dr. Seider will then program it into his equipment and map out the treatment. Todd will be notified when the plan is set and that is when he will begin his treatment. Side effects from the treatment include fatigue and nausea, which he will be getting a prescription to help with the nausea. Radiation burns shouldn't be a problem because treatment is relatively low rad. We were also told that there was a slight chance of sterility. The treatment will not be anywhere near the testicle, but there is always a chance that the radiation could bounce and end up there. Needless to say we had to discuss the issue of spermbanking. Our thoughts are that we are lucky enough to have two beautiful children, if it's God's will for us to have another than so be it. If not we will be more than happy with the two we have right now.

"For with God nothing shall be impossible." Luke1:37

Had we not contained ourselves, I think they would have heard us in California!!! However unfortunate we are that this has to be cancer, we are fortunate enough that pathology reports that it is a pure seminoma. While it's still cancer, it is the lesser of two evils. Pure seminoma's have a 99% cure rate!! Todd will require radiation therapy (a lot less harsher on the body than chemotherapy). The lymph node in question was reportedly "borderline enlarged". This could be from the cancer or it could be congenital. Once the radiation is started it should melt away, if not it could just have been that way to begin with. We are expecting to hear from a Radiation Oncologist on Tuesday of next week to set up an appointment to get the ball rolling. Because of his surgery, he won't be able to start the radiation therapy for about 3 weeks and his therapy should last anywhere from 3-4 (possibly 4-6 weeks due to the problem lymph node). Once his radiation is finished he will have to get regular CT scans and blood tests to check the serum levels. This surveillance will last for about a year or two. We were also informed that he is at greater risk for other cancers, but we will cross that bridge should we ever come to it.

From the bottom of our hearts we want to thank each and every one of you who have sent a card, said a prayer, delivered a meal or just thought of us. It means so much to us to have such caring people like you that we call our friends. Though we still have a long road to haul- we will reach our destination although at times it may be rocky. We so greatly appreciate everything that everyone has done!! Really, we can not even begin to express the gratitude to all of you who care so much, it fills our hearts with joy to have friends and family like you!

The orchiectomy

Today is the day in which Todd, as he calls it, lost half his manhood. The whole procedure, which took place at Aultman Hospital, took about 45 minutes and a 4 inch incision. Dr. Kraus met with me after the surgery and brought me up to speed. The whole surgery went well, but there was a groinal lymph node that was visible. I was reassured that it was not enlarged, but merely visible. They cut the tumor in half right in the OR and could tell 100% that it was a malignancy. He also explained that the overwhelming pain that Todd had had days ago was from a spot within the tumor which had started to die. I was also informed that the tumor markers (from his blood work) were not elevated. That could be good or bad. The way I understood it was that nonseminoma's have a tendency to not show elevated tumor markers. Treatment is going to come down to the pathology report. If it comes back as a seminoma Todd will undergo low dose radiation therapy. However, if the reports come back as a nonseminoma, Todd will likely undergo a second surgery, the RPLND, to remove the visible lymph node. On top of the RPLND he would possibly have to have some chemotherapy. We have an appointment set up for this friday to see the dr and get the pathology results. They aren't kidding when they say that it's just a waiting game!

The results are in...

We got the all clear today!!! According to the CT scan taken wednesday, everything was clear. However, that doesn't mean that it hasn't spread. There could still be some cells floating around and they haven't shown up anywhere yet. Depending on how the pathology report comes back, Todd may only need radiation following the orchiectomy. At least we have made it over one hurdle, with many more still to come I'm sure.

Get the facts

Here are some little know facts on testicular cancer

• TC is the most common type of cancer affecting men between the ages of 15-35 (peaking between the ages of 20-34).
• TC is almost always curable if detected early. ( So all you males out there- do a monthly self-exam! It only takes a minute and it is just as easy as taking your testicle and rolling it between your thumb and forefinger to feel for any lumps. Testicles should be smooth and egg shaped, you shouldn't feel any lumps.)
• Testicular cancers are generally found my men themselves. Tumors can be painless, a hardening, change in size or pain in the testicle.
• TC can be treated with surgery, radiation, chemotherapy, surveillance, or any combination of the above mentioned treatments.

Testicular tumors begin in special sperm-forming cells known as germ cells. 40% of testicular tumors are seminomas which are made of immature germ cells and are very sensitive to radiation therapy. Nonseminomas are made up of mature germ cells, can occur in combinations and are more aggresive. These types are generally treated with a RPLND (retroperitoneal lymph node dissection).

Because of the advances in medical technology, nearly 90% of men with any metastisis are cured!! That is a huge leap from 38 years ago, finding only a 10% cure rate in 1970! Here are some cure rate stats:

• Stage I ( cancer confined to testicle) seminoma- 99%!!!
• Stage I nonseminoma- 98%!
• Stage II (cancer spread to retroperitoneal lymph nodes) - 90%!
• Stage III ( cancer spread beyond lymph nodes into organs) - 50-80%!

Symptoms of testicular cancer include:

• A lump in either testicle.
• Any enlargement of either testicle.
• Significant shrinking of the testicle.
• Hardening or softening of a testicle.
• A feeling of heaviness.
• Dull ache in lower abdomen or groin area.
• A sudden collection of fluid in the scrotum.
• Pain or discomfort in the testicle or scrotum.
• Enlargement or tenderness of the breasts.

What's most important is knowing your body. Know your body enough to know when something isn't right. Do not be afraid to get checked out if you feel something abnormal to you!

Canton Urology

By just looking at the ultrasound, they are 99% sure that this is a malignant tumor. We were, however, reminded that while cancer sounds scary, testicular cancer is very curable. Todd was ordered to get a blood draw to check for tumor markers, a CT scan of the pelvis, abdomen and chest (May 14th), and also an orchiectomy (May 20th). We were told that he would no doubt need to have the testicle removed. Anytime there is a growth it always gets removed because a biospy would risk spreading the cancer into another lymph system. It was explained that the scrotum and the testicle were on two different lymph systems, spreading it to a second lymph system would only make it worse. They make a small incision in the belt area and remove the whole testicle and send the mass to pathology. We were also told about other possible treatments, banking sperm and how curable this type of cancer is.

Going into this appointment we had already kind of expected to hear that they were pretty certain we were looking at testicular cancer. To tell the truth we did some crying and we are scared, but we know the odds are in our favor. We know that we have an army of people behind us praying each and every day. More importantly we have the will to win. I say "we" because while Todd is the one who is sick, he is part of me. We are one.

Research day, subject: Testicular Cancer

I'm a highly analytical person. I want to know the facts. I do alot of digging until I feel as though I have enough information on a subject to help me understand. So in doing my research on testicular cancer this morning I came across a website which I found to very helpful, http://tcrc.acor.org/. It's a few years old but it really breaks things down into plain english. Basically there are two types (each with several subtypes) the seminoma and the nonseminoma. Both are treated by removing the affected testicle but, further treatment depends on the type. Seminoma's in North America are usually treated with radiation following the orchiectomy (removal of the testicle). Nonseminoma's are usually treated with a retroperitoneal lymph node dissection ( a large incision is made down the abdomen and the lymph node is removed) and chemotherapy. While these treatments, not to mention the word cancer, sound very scary- testicular cancer is very curable! Medicine has brought us a long way!! Cure rate is said to be 98-99% for either type of testicular cancer.

Last night, I admit, I was scared. Something about the "C" word does that to a person. This morning, however, after doing my digging I have to tell you I feel much better about meeting Dr. Kraus on Tuesday.

Our story begins...

The morning started out like any other day- my hitting the snooze button for the 3rd time! I finally forced myself out of bed to get a start on the busy morning. I had errands to run and appointments to be kept all before 9am!!! I finished getting ready and woke up Todd, my husband, so he could get a start on his busy morning as well. All was going well until he hunched over in pain, pain like never before. The nurse in me kicks in...rate the pain, where is it, how does it feel, so on and so forth. He compared the pain to being "kicked in the balls for 3 straight hours." He could hardly walk, let alone move so I told him he had two options...either I take him to the local ER or he calls his dr and asks to be seen right away. He opts for the latter. I left the house, ran my errands, came back and drove him an hour to see his dr. By this time he was in tears because he hurt so bad. Mind you the whole time I'm saying to myself "it's just a hernia." I couldn't have been more wrong. Dr. Brown thought it was probably a hydrocele, which is basically fluid on the testicle. He sent us for an ultrasound to confirm. Unfortunately, what the ultrasound technician found was not fluid but, a solid mass. Dr. Brown called to give us the results and I think had I been standing I would have fell to the floor. That was the first we heard the dreaded word- cancer. In my mind I'm thinking "what in the world just happened here?" Did I really just hear what I thought I heard? By the end of the evening Dr. Brown had made us an appointment with a Dr. Kraus with Canton Urology at Aultman Hospital for Tuesday, May 13th. Again, I say "what just happened?"